So, my plan. The Plan didn’t come to fruition.  In fact, it was trampled on in it’s infancy.  The Plan was: move, move to Raleigh, move to Buffalo, live where I wasn’t tied down with a lease, save up a shit ton of money (which I could do since I’d be living in Buffalo or Raleigh) and save enough money to quit in June, traveltraveltraveltravel until the funds ran out and start over again in another city.  That was The Plan.  The Plan didn’t even get out of the gate.

And so I’m here.  Still.  In the same life.  Doing the same thing, different day.  Same rhythm, same existence, same mistakes, same kryptonite.

If you had told me one year ago that this is where I’d sit, I’m not sure I would have believed you.  In fact, I’m sure that I wouldn’t have changed one single action or decision.  I’m stubborn like that.

What do you do when you find yourself in a life you don’t particularly love?  Because, shouldn’t you LOVE your life?  You make changes.  I’m making changes.  I’m trying not to make the same mistakes…..I’m not going for another ride on this carousel.  I’ve been going round and round and while it’s fun at first, eventually you realize your view never changes.

Facing the parts of my life that need some work is not as scary as I thought it would be.  It’s actually pretty simple.  You just do it.  It’s as simple as that.  It’s not going to be perfect, its not going to be smooth, it’s going to be the path avoided, never traveled.

In love: I’m not riding this carousel any more and I’m not content to live marginally.  I want it all.

In job: I guess it’s time to not be complacent.  Let’s see what’s out there, shall we?

In finances: let’s get solvent shall we?  Let’s plan a trip, plan a future, plan for a rainy day.

I dont know how it happened, because I’ve been avoiding these changes like the bubonic plague for a long time….but it did.  I woke up and am moving forward.  I’m not looking back.

I took this picture last week at the Canadian family compound:

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